The End of the World as We Know It

As I was driving back to my apartment tonight, I looked up and saw a small bright light coming straight down over the shoulder of the road. It looked like a shooting star. But it seemed a lot closer, like maybe 50 feet in front of me. It was probably a reflection from the lights of the car passing me on the left. I don't know. I thought it seemed a bit strange. Then I thought about if it were the end times (like for real, not like this is the age of the end times kind of thing) then how sudden would that be? And how strange it would look to people. What if this was it?

Then I thought about what we talk about in church all the time but I rarely see happening (of whose fault but my own?) - ask yourself -
How many of the people do I know would be going to heaven in the end times?
How many of them can actually say that Jesus Christ is their Lord and Savior?
How many of them think of His name as something other than a swear word when they are frustrated
How many just think He is an awkward and uncomfortable topic of conversation?
How many of them simply don't believe that He exists?

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son."
John 3:16-18 NIV

You have been given a choice. We are not robots. You can choose to follow and do your own thing. Live your life how you want to live it. Out have that freedom. Or you can go after the good things. It means denying self. It doesn't mean this life here on earth will be perfect. But it means a security in your eternal existence. It means that you will not be bound for eternal torture, that you are trying so feebly to run from right now. Just look at what we do. We try to avoid bad situations an horrible things and circumstances. It's impossible to do so here on earth. But it's not impossible with Christ in the scheme of eternity. Think about that for a moment. Everything that hurts you. You could be living with that pain for eternity. Or you could turn it over to your Savior who took all that pain and agony on Himself, hung it on the cross, and separated it as far as the east from the west when He rose up out of that grave!

You can be mad at me for posting such things. Or you can study and see what the Bible is really all about. If you don't know something, study it. Be willing to learn. You cannot be open minded if you shut out the things you are unsure or have questions about. Ask questions. I may not be able to answer all of them, but I can try. If I don't know something I will do some research and try to find an answer for you.

You'll never get to know someone without having a conversation with them. I can at least help with the introductions. The rest is up to you, whether you keep that conversation going. I can only plant seeds, I can't make them grow.

Resolution/Revolution

New Year's. The cliche time of year when people make resolutions that typically last maybe a week. Maybe longer. But rarely through the year.

I don't really have any resolutions. Goals, maybe. But not resolutions in the traditional sense.

I'm currently sitting at my parent's house watching/listening to the International House of Prayer, Kansas City, onething conference. Ringing in the new year, not with watching a shiny crystal ball fall from a tower in NYC and listening to pithy secular music, but ringing in the new year with worshiping the One who gave us life. I desire to see the level of worship that they have at onething in the local churches here. The focus on prayer and worship, along with rightly dividing the Word.

My desires for the new year are to grow deeper in Christ. To sell out to Him. To lose myself for the One who found me. In my worship, in my prayer life, in my devotions, in my readings, in my life.

On Sunday, pastor Floyd talked about living wholeheartedly for God, and asked the simple question: Are you living wholeheartedly for God? Just a few days ago I was thinking about how I don't like who I am outside of church. I let my guard down. I don't pay as close attention to what I say, or how I react to things, or who is around me. It made me thing: What kind of Christian am I? A Pharisaical hypocrite! I don't want to catch myself wondering how I would act, or react, if I were around people from church. Because it doesn't matter whether I am around people from church, or if I'm in the middle of a crowd of strangers - there. is. always. ONE. constant. - and that is Christ. He is the only One I should care about how I act around. Which means the anger, and irritation, and annoyance (because I tend to be antisocial and jump to conclusions, etc [like walking into a store and being judgmental because they don't have something on the shelf that I think they should have and I let them know it), need to be transformed into love. So, in short: No. I haven't been living wholeheartedly.

Another desire for this new year... Which sounds like a cliche resolution at first: to lose weight/become more fit. But I want to do it, not only for health, or to fit into clothes I haven't worn since college... I want to get to a point where I can kneel in prayer again. Maybe that sounds silly. I know that how you situate yourself when you pray is not as meaningful as what you pray... but there's just something about kneeling in prayer. And I can't stand it that I can't kneel. So that's my biggest motivation for losing weight. Aside from all the other reasons (like maybe my knees wouldn't give me such issues in general, aside from not being able to bend to kneel). I want to be able to jump and lift my hands in worship without being self-conscious about how I might look (Coz I know it can't be pretty).

I also hope to continue to grow in my spiritual giftings/discovering them. Learning to walk in what I haven't yet fully discovered or had revealed to me.

I'm excited for what this year holds. I could recap this last year. It was full of firsts. Apartment. Full-time job. Car. It was also a time of transition and growth. Much of that to do with my church (no it's not technically mine, i don't own it, it's God's church, but it's where i go, and where i call home). A point of transition - spiritually especially, happened during out Women's retreat in August. I am blown away by the transformation in the women of the church, in myself, and in the church as a whole as a result of the things we learned that weekend. I feel like it accomplished what we set out to do: grow deeper in Christ, and get to know each other better and bring unity to our women's group. Although I have not been able to attend on Wednesday nights much since the retreat, I still feel that there is a closeness that was not there before the retreat. It brought us together. Most important it brought us closer to Jesus. I really feel like that weekend, although I was kind of distant all weekend due to personal battles trying to steal it from me, was a turning point for me to bring me out of the desert again.

I can't wait to see what God has in store for me this year, but also for the church. I'm looking forward - praying & believing - for immense spiritual growth, for courage to spread the Gospel, to speak to the surrounding people and communities, to show the people in this county who God truly is.

Anyway, that is all I have for now. I already started this post last year, and what do you know, a new year has already rolled around! (sorry for the stale new year's joke)

Commercialism and Connection - A potpourri of thoughts

The more I see of commercialism, the more I hate it.

Yes, I like stuff just as much as the next person. But I keep getting annoyed with stuff. Like my last computer hard drive disc. It stopped working. I lost all my pictures, music, and other files. It was depressing.

I think of photography. I love photography. I like looking at pictures. I want a decent camera (like a DSLR) just so I could contribute to the plethora of photographs that are out there. Because people don't take the time to stop and enjoy the sights of what is around them every day. But then I think of heaven. We won't have photography in heaven. We won't need photography in heaven. Because we will be worshiping the Creator of all the beautiful things we see in this world. That will be all that will matter. Worshiping the Creator.

I look at days like today. Black Friday. The "kickoff" of the so-called "Christmas Season". People take one day to be thankful on Thanksgiving, and turn around the next day and practice a ridiculous display of greed, on what is supposed to be the season in which we celebrate the birth of our Savior, Christ Jesus. Never mind the fact that it's a Catholic holiday (I am a non-denominational Bible-believing Christian,) and I do not celebrate the Catholic Mass remembering Christ's birth, but I do think that His birth is obviously worth remembering (and I dislike those who want to take Christ out of Christmas). Christmas is also not in the correct season... since Jesus was likely not born in the winter time. Christmas trees stem from a pagan ritual to celebrate the winter solstice, so should we as Christians really be decorating them?

How easily we lose sight of what is important in this season: Celebrating Jesus Christ and the fact that He came to earth, to live and grow up here like we do, yet without sin, so that He could take the burden of our sins and die in our place. Spending time with family and friends - being face to face with those we love... not going out and buying more crap that can't love us back.

Community and belonging are things that have been on my heart for a long time. Something that I don't see many churches *get* even though they may talk about it. So to see people, both Christians and non-Christians, so disconnected from others that they would trample those in front of them just to get some piece of metal/plastic, it's heartbreaking.

One of my more recent thoughts has been "Connect In Person". If you follow me on Twitter, you'll see me hashtag it sometimes, #ConnectInPerson. As much as I enjoy technology and social media, it can be a detriment to your social life. I would much rather spend time with people than online just browsing random sites and checking on what other people are doing. I don't get to spend a lot of time with family or friends because of my schedule. I enjoy when I can spend time with people. I think we focus too much on our social scores online, Facebook stalking each other, following people just to get more followers. Lately the unsubscribe button in e-mails has been my friend, when it works. I get too many stock e-mails, not enough personal ones. I see too much clutter in my Twitter feed. There are too many obnoxious posts on Facebook. So at the risk of losing followers, I am un-following several people and products, just to clean up my feeds.

Why do they call it a feed? What are we feeding ourselves? These social media platforms don't force us to follow these people or pages. What are we posting? Are we lifting up others with what we say? Or are we constantly tearing down everyone, including ourselves?

That is about the end of my thoughts for this evening. I'll leave you with a quote that has been on my mind recently. Mostly as I reflect on the craziness of this year. I could give a recap, but that should be another post in and of itself, and I don't know if I feel like doing that. But it's on my mind, and it also relates to general connectedness. Because I would not be as connected with my church family now if it wasn't for the events of the last year with my job, moving, the women's retreat, spiritual growth, and other happenings throughout the year.

“We had some random things happen to us; some good, some bad, some you can’t explain, some you don’t want to, but one thing we did learn for sure…when God throws a curveball…don’t duck…you just might miss something.” 

      Will --- Extreme Days