typical rambling while feeling frustrated and negative... blah.

meh. I don't like all these negative posts but negative is the way I've been feeling. I'm sitting up hoping that when I go to sleep I'm not woke up by the phone ringing in the morning to find Chase bank calling and harassing me about my past due balance on my loan. What I'd like to say to Chase: "Yes, I know it's past due. No I don't have the money to pay you. No, I can't borrow it from someone else. What? You want me to go into more debt with someone else just to pay you? Oh, you just want me not in debt to you, you don't care who else I'm in debt to?...." I don't know. That's basically the conversation I've been having. I can't think of any way to be nice. Angry. Frustrated. Peeved.

I'm tired of it. I'm tired of them. Talk about anxiety. I can't do anything about this situation right now. Even if I got a job two weeks ago it wouldn't help with any of this. They act like they're surprised when I tell them I haven't been able to pay them because I haven't gotten a job yet. Then the lady today goes and tells me to get a job at McDonald's or BK and I told her I tried, and the person who interviewed me at McD's saw that I'd worked with computers and decided I was overqualified to work there. They don't understand that if I'd had a job in the 6 months since their "grace period" started that I'd have been paying them. Maybe I just don't get it. Maybe I'm the stupid one. But I've been trying like crazy to get a job so I don't have to deal with all this crap and can have some peace.

Anyway, I went to a job interview today. I'm praying that I get it coz it's basically what I want to do right now, work on computers. It would be a great environment too. It sounded really positive. So please pray that it works out. I could really use something that works out for once...